Burn After Reading (2008) quotes
Directors
Ethan Coen, Joel Coen.
Cast
Brad Pitt.
Frances McDormand.
George Clooney.
A disk containing mysterious information from a CIA agent ends up in the hands of two unscrupulous and daft gym employees who attempt to sell it.
I have a drinking problem? Fuck you, Peck, you’re a Mormon. Compared to you we ALL have a drinking problem!
– Osbourne Cox
Osbourne Cox? I thought you might be worried… about the security… of your shit.
– Chad Feldheimer
What did we learn, Palmer?
– CIA Superior
I don’t know, sir.
– CIA Officer
I don’t fuckin’ know either. I guess we learned not to do it again.
– CIA Superior
Yes, sir.
– CIA Officer
I’m fucked if I know what we did.
– CIA Superior
Yes, sir, it’s, uh, hard to say.
– CIA Officer
Jesus Fucking Christ.
– CIA Superior
You work for Tuchman Marsh?
– Harry Pfarrer
Yes.
– Tuchman Marsh Man
Is that a law firm?
– Harry Pfarrer
No, a rock band – yes it’s a law firm…
– Tuchman Marsh Man
What a clusterfuck!
– CIA Superior
No. No, I’m sorry, I don’t know the number to, uh, my savings account because believe it or not I don’t spend my entire day sitting around trying to memorize the fucking numbers to my fucking bank accounts! Moron!
– Osbourne Cox
If you ever carried out your proposed threat you would experience such a shitstorm of consequences my friend your empty little head would be spinning faster than the wheels of your Schwinn bicycle back there.
– Osbourne Cox
You think that’s a Schwinn!
– Chad Feldheimer
Well, hello!
– Harry Pfarrer
Oh my fuck… I just killed a fucking spook!
– Harry Pfarrer
We’ll… interface with the FBI on this dead body.
– CIA Officer
No, no. God no. We don’t need those idiots fucking everything up. Burn the body. Get rid of it.
– CIA Superior
OK.
– CIA Officer
That’s just a kryptonite lock. You can open those fuckers with a bic pen.
– Chad Feldheimer
Osbourne Cox?
– Chad Feldheimer
Yes, this is Osbourne Cox, who the FUCK are YOU?
– Osbourne Cox
Maybe I can get a run in.
– Harry Pfarrer
Who the fuck do you work for, you fucker?
– Harry Pfarrer
This is Mr Krapotkin from the Russian embassy.
– Krapotkin
Mr Crapkin… Is this a secure line?
– Linda Litzke
Are you joking?
– Krapotkin
What the fuck…?
– Osbourne Cox
You should put up a note in the ladies locker room.
– Linda Litzke
Put up a note? “Highly classified shit found: Signal intelligence shit, CIA shit?” Hello, anybody lose their secret CIA shit? I don’t think so!
– Chad Feldheimer
Give me the CD!
– Osbourne Cox
As soon as you give us the money, dickwad!
– Chad Feldheimer
Appearances can be… deceptive.
– Chad Feldheimer
It was nothing. Drivel.
– Krapotkin
Dribble?
– Linda Litzke
Go around the corner, we’ll do it in the back.
– Harry Pfarrer
You’re so coarse.
– Katie Cox
Back of the car… not the… rear-entry situation…
– Harry Pfarrer
Report back to me when it makes sense.
– CIA Superior
Manolo, you DIDN’T find this.
– Chad Feldheimer
I found it on the floor there.
– Manolo
Yeah, I know. But…
– Chad Feldheimer
Right there on the floor there. Just lying there.
– Manolo