Red Heat (1988) quotes

Director
Walter Hill.

Cast
Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Jim Belushi.
Peter Boyle.
Laurence Fishburne.

A tough Russian policeman is forced to partner up with a cocky Chicago police detective.

Since I figure cops are cops the world over, how do you Soviets deal with all the tension and stress?
– Commander Lou Donnelly CPD
Vodka.
– Ivan Danko

Revolutionary political leaders like myself are incarcerated to keep us quiet.
– Abdul Elijah
What is your political crime?
– Ivan Danko
I robbed a bank.
– Abdul Elijah

I have car under control.
– Ivan Danko
Yeah, I’m sure they taught you all about cars and the price of insurance at your famous Russian school in Kiev!
– Art Ridzik
In socialist countries, insurance not necessary. State pays for everything.
– Ivan Danko
Yeah? Well, tell me something, Captain. If you’ve got such a fucking paradise over there, how come you’re up the same creek as we are with heroin and cocaine?
– Art Ridzik
Chinese find way. Right after revolution, they round up all drug dealers, all drug addicts, take them to public square, and shoot them in back of head.
– Ivan Danko
Ah, it’d never work here. Fucking politicians wouldn’t go for it.
– Art Ridzik
Shoot them first.
– Ivan Danko

Captain Danko, congratulations. You are now the proud owner of the most powerful handgun in the world.
– Art Ridzik
Soviet Podbyrin, nine-point-two milimeter, is world’s most powerful handgun.
– Ivan Danko
Oh, come on, everybody knows the .44 Magnum is the big boy on the block. Why do you think Dirty Harry uses it?
– Art Ridzik
Who is Dirty Harry?
– Ivan Danko

Your gun Danko, now! Don’t fuck with me!
– Commander Lou Donnelly CPD

Oh, great. We got a pro basketball team coming toward us – with guns!
– Art Ridzik

Very strange city. The crime is organized; the police is not.
– Ivan Danko

About this pile-of-shit pimp in here. In this country, we try to protect the rights of individuals. It’s called the Miranda Act, and it says that you can’t even touch his ass.
– Art Ridzik
I do not want to touch his ass. I want to make him talk!
– Ivan Danko

I’m gonna get us something from all four food groups: hamburgers, french fries, coffee and doughnuts.
– Art Ritzik

What, you retire your uniform?
– Art Ridzik
I now work undercover.
– Ivan Danko
Undercover? You look like Gumby.
– Art Ridzik

You know this game? It’s called chicken, except you’re not supposed to play it with buses.
– Art Ridzik