The Upside (2017) quotes

A comedic look at the relationship between a wealthy man with quadriplegia and an unemployed man with a criminal record who’s hired to help him.

You can have any girl you want. What about this lady with all the Botox? You’re perfect for each other. You can’t move your body, she can’t move her face.
– Dell Scott

Where are the signatures?
– Parole Officer
I’ve been looking, trust me.
– Dell Scott
I’m not paid to trust you. Do you want to go back to prison?
– Parole Officer
I didn’t belong in prison.
– Dell Scott
You need to prove you’re looking for work.
– Parole Officer
I am. It’s just that the leads that the computer keeps choosing for me, they’re not for me. The computer don’t know me. You don’t know me.
– Dell Scott
Well, I know you, Mr. Scott, and you need three signatures by tomorrow, or you can tell it to the judge.
– Parole Officer

Look, Dell, just find something you love doing. And then find a way to scale it. I mean, what are you really good at?
– Philip Lacasse
Well, it’s clearly not this.
– Dell Scott

Good morning, Mr. Scott.
– Yvonne Pendleton
Ain’t it?
– Dell Scott
I can sign your paperwork.
– Yvonne Pendleton
There’s no need. I’m going to take the gig.
– Dell Scott
Wouldn’t it be better if I just signed your papers? You are not qualified for this position. You have never done it before.
– Yvonne Pendleton
Look, does he want me or not?
– Dell Scott
Yes, he does
– Yvonne Pendleton
Alright, so good.
– Dell Scott

Hey, it’s time to let the beard go.
– Dell Scott
Why?
– Philip Lacasse
Just trust me on this one.
– Dell Scott

You as rich as Jay-Z?
– Dell Scott
No. Richer.
– Philip Lacasse
Jeez.
– Dell Scott
Money doesn’t buy you everything.
– Philip Lacasse
Hey, look like it does to me.
– Dell Scott

Talk to me. Talk to me.
– Dell Scott
I look like a…
– Philip Lacasse
A porn star.
– Dell Scott